A Pastor’s Honest Reflection

In less than two weeks, The Beloved Church of Kalamazoo will gather publicly for the first time. We have prayed, planned, and prepared for this moment. There is joy and anticipation in my heart. There is also a sobering awareness that I must share with you.

Eugene Peterson once wrote:

“The pastor’s real work is what Ivan Illich calls ‘shadow work’ — the work nobody gets paid for and few notice but that makes a world of salvation: meaning and value and purpose, a world of love and hope and faith — in short, the kingdom of God.”

That resonates deeply with me. The true calling of a pastor is not to build a brand, fill seats, or chase visible “success.” My real work is often invisible: praying for you when no one is watching, holding space for God’s Word to take root, guiding us back when we drift, and pointing us again and again to Jesus.

The Church Is Not the Kingdom

The temptation for pastors is to confuse the church with the Kingdom of God. Karl Barth, a great theologian, reminded us that even religion can become idolatry if it distracts from Christ. The church is called to witness to the Kingdom, not to become the Kingdom.

That distinction matters. When we measure our worth by attendance, money, or influence, we risk bowing to the idol of success rather than the King of Kings. When people equate “church” with “God’s Kingdom,” disappointment and cynicism follow. My responsibility is to guard us from that confusion.

The Danger of Spiritual Sin

The poet Dante showed us that the worst sins are not always the obvious ones. They are the spiritual sins: pride, hypocrisy, using holy language for self-gain. These sins creep in unnoticed and can poison the soul of a church.

As your pastor, I must be the first to confess that I am not immune. I feel the pull toward pride, performance, and wanting to “prove” that this church is successful. God has called me to resist those temptations and lead us in humility.

What “Success” Really Means

If success is not numbers or noise, what is it?

  • Success is when one person begins to believe again that they are loved by God.
  • Success is when a family finds healing, forgiveness, and new hope.
  • Success is when we, as a community, learn to love our neighbors just as Jesus loved us.
  • Success is when Jesus, not us, remains the hero of our story.
  • Success is when the Holy Spirit sets people free from what is holding them back.

That is the work worth giving my life to.

A Shared Responsibility

This is not only my responsibility as pastor, it is ours together. We must hold each other to this standard of keeping our eyes on Jesus, not the idol of church growth. We must remember that The Beloved Church is a pointer, not the point. The Kingdom of God is bigger than us, and that is good news.

Closing Prayer

My prayer as we launch is this:

Lord, let us never confuse Your Kingdom with our church. Keep us humble, faithful, and free from the idolatry of success. Teach us to love one another deeply, and may all we do point back to You.